Ila says:
Every one of the ratings for this project (all being 5 out of 5) were written by people who signed up the week following the creation of this project, and all respondents reviewed ONLY this project.
This is not real community participation and is not a true reflection of the quality of this project.
A real review:
Positive:
There is cleverness here. I like the theme of masculinity, especially in a world where men's rights over children are so touch and go, and the trope of the mustache is both symbolic and fun (and making it a transferable symbol with the fake mustaches is a great idea). Some, but not all, of the characters are well thought out caricatures, and a recognizable caricature lubricates the comedic reaction for the audience. There's also some fun wordplay (although I'm not referring to the puns).
Negative:
Some of the hyperbole in the character development goes too far. You stop caring about their circumstances because they become too divorced from anything familiar.
You don't need to diminish one gender to elevate another. Mind you, I recognize that no one is represented in a positive light here, but we have a clear dichotomy between the masculine protagonist and the feminine antagonist, which is an old, tired, and lazy strategy.
The plot starts as amusing and then cascades into an avalanche of nonsense. Stick with the character focus in believable (well... slightly exaggerated) situations rather than depending on absurdity to surprise--everyone is surprised by absurdity because it bears no relation to reality, so it's not really an accomplishment.
The fact is, you could place the Mansitters in the real world, with well developed female and male characters around them, and they would be funny. Hapless but visionary men. You could even make them misogynistic without losing sympathy so long as your setting doesn't reinforce that as objective reality.
Remember that gags are just that, they don't work as plots. For example, the training rooms with the bear attack practice is great! It's a visual gag that works because it doesn't go on too long, so the audience doesn't feel alienated. Your episode arc (the towel baby...) went on too long and wasn't funny, it was just weird and sad.
This could actually be a funny and well-timed show with some re-imagining of the world that surrounds your main characters.
By the way, I don't mean for any of my criticism to sound insulting. I'm commending on the product not the producer and only to be constructive. If you're posting publicly, I assume you're looking for honest feedback.
This is not real community participation and is not a true reflection of the quality of this project.
A real review:
Positive:
There is cleverness here. I like the theme of masculinity, especially in a world where men's rights over children are so touch and go, and the trope of the mustache is both symbolic and fun (and making it a transferable symbol with the fake mustaches is a great idea). Some, but not all, of the characters are well thought out caricatures, and a recognizable caricature lubricates the comedic reaction for the audience. There's also some fun wordplay (although I'm not referring to the puns).
Negative:
Some of the hyperbole in the character development goes too far. You stop caring about their circumstances because they become too divorced from anything familiar.
You don't need to diminish one gender to elevate another. Mind you, I recognize that no one is represented in a positive light here, but we have a clear dichotomy between the masculine protagonist and the feminine antagonist, which is an old, tired, and lazy strategy.
The plot starts as amusing and then cascades into an avalanche of nonsense. Stick with the character focus in believable (well... slightly exaggerated) situations rather than depending on absurdity to surprise--everyone is surprised by absurdity because it bears no relation to reality, so it's not really an accomplishment.
The fact is, you could place the Mansitters in the real world, with well developed female and male characters around them, and they would be funny. Hapless but visionary men. You could even make them misogynistic without losing sympathy so long as your setting doesn't reinforce that as objective reality.
Remember that gags are just that, they don't work as plots. For example, the training rooms with the bear attack practice is great! It's a visual gag that works because it doesn't go on too long, so the audience doesn't feel alienated. Your episode arc (the towel baby...) went on too long and wasn't funny, it was just weird and sad.
This could actually be a funny and well-timed show with some re-imagining of the world that surrounds your main characters.
By the way, I don't mean for any of my criticism to sound insulting. I'm commending on the product not the producer and only to be constructive. If you're posting publicly, I assume you're looking for honest feedback.
