More About Me
Brandon Wyse has successfully written his first novel entitled, “God’s Playing Chess in 2007. Most who read this stated he should turn the novel into a screenplay, and although not knowledgeable in screenwriting, he successfully won a screenplay award for it in Santa Fe, NM in 2008.
This started his writing career and over the last 3 years, Mr. Wyse has written a total of 44 screenplays to date.
In addition to writing screenplays, Mr. Wyse has also given his talent toward helping others. He gives screenplay analysis and advice for a very nominal fee. Has done coverage analysis for Scripped.com and Spike TV.
At the present time, Mr. Wyse has succeeded in the following:
• Completed script for actor, Ving Rhames.
• Mr. Wyse has had numerous of his screenplays optioned in the last two years.
• Completed short script “Demas”, for producer/director, David Hof, which started production Jan 2011.
• Managing Partner/Chairman in a newly formed film company, Bi-Polar Productions, which first film is in post-production.
• Currently has written the life story screenplay of heavyweight champ, Ken Norton, which is in development.
• Currently turned Best-selling author, Carl Hiassen’s novel, “Tourist Season” into a screenplay.
• Co-Creator of the television pilot Hollywood 101.
• Finished a script for actor, Ron Perlman Dec/2010
• Finished a biopic on Ariel Sharon, which is currently seeking private financing.
• Directed and wrote first feature film, “The Ritual” in 2011. Currently at the film circuit seeking distribution.
The only noticeable flaw is the structure. The standard formula is off slightly. I will give my two cents on the tiny things that could easily fix the structure. This script definitely had a "The Craft" like tone to it.
1) I think a little more foreshadowing of the coven is essential. By doing this, you'll add an element of suspense. The writer can do this by hiding the coven where the girls are just rebels dabbling in the ethereal arts and mysteriously wind up in this coven to cater to the rebellion to what is trim and proper. But they didn't find the coven, it found them.
2) I believe having the child with an invisible friend that is haunting her in the beginning would add some marvelous horror and fit a genre that doesn't seem to die. She seems to accept this thing as she grows.
3) Take a slow build up with the flashback of the initial fight when Wicca learns of the coven and some of the reveals are shown. This way, it's not a bump in the writing like flashbacks often give. The flashback was way too soon to show that material.
4)This could draw back pages 20-23, or the school inception pages which show her character in school. This would be a mystery to the audience in surprise, that something that was haunting her is now her "protector."
5)By page 50, the pacing slowed quite a bit. I would suggest the girls doing some outrageous supernatural activity of some sort.
6) The jump to Wicca looking at her father's grave happened too fast. I didn't have time to gauge Wicca reaction to this horrible thing happening to her. She kind of was blaise about it.
7) After page 70 there was a lot of bumps in the reading. By this I mean in the action lines -- there was a tremendous amount of nods, head shakes, hand rubbing together, and looks to the characters. It greatly slowed down the intensity of their preparations to go after the demon.
I know that sounds like a lot, but its really a polish and reordering things. Overall, it was a great script!!!