Rapper's Delight

Creator: fran harris
Age rating: 13 and older
On the eve of a life changing record label meeting, a successful gangstah rapper discovers he can't curse after his daughter prays a special prayer.
Project collaboration: Closed
Synopsis: DELIGHT, 8, adorable and nobody’s fool, anticipates her favorite thing, her famous gangsta rapper Daddy picking her up at school, but Daddy is too busy catapulting to the top of the charts shooting videos, signing books, bumping with the bitches and hos, so Delight has to settle for his Girl Friday, LANIECE, to ferry her to Tai Kwan Do.

SPOON, aka Trevan Weatherspoon, meanwhile, misses that cue, and the sense that things are changing when he meets his biggest fan, BLEW, a wanna be rapper in a black yarmulke and a headband that reads “Just Jew It.” Blew busts out some of Spoon’s old school rap, while sending Spoon into hysterics with Woody Allen-meets-rappa lines. Blew wants to be Spoon’s apprentice. And while it’s not gonna happen now, it’s gonna happen soon, we know it…

It’s a good thing, too, as Blew’s is the only love Spoon’s getting these days, as ANNETTE, Spoon’s wife, is fed up with his absenteeism, especially on behalf of Delight, who lives and dies by his comings and goings. Annette, successful in her own right in the PR world, keeps a healthy, happy house, but Delight aches for Spoon, dashing at every opportunity to steal a secret moment with him, even if it means a sneak session of the forbidden Captain Crunch.

It’s a brief moment, though, and soon Delight is back in her busy world, trying to do her thing. Until MARCO, a classmate, throws some attitude and the “b” word at her. She holds her ground, but when he won’t back down, she unleashes her Tae Kwan Do moves on him, feeling righteous until she discovers who Marco’s inspiration was. Her own Daddy. His CD was in Marco’s player, now broken.

Making matters worse, Spoon forgets to pick her up at choir practice, where Spoon’s daddy, and Delight’s grandpa, REVEREND WEATHERSPOON, preaches. After a little coaxing, Delight regales the reverend with the stupid antics of boys in general, and Marco in particular. The Reverend tells her to pray, especially for the knuckleheads, and that sincere prayers will certainly be answered.
When Delight finally gets the chance to grill Spoon on why he hates women Spoon tapdances around the subject, offering excuses for his language, “I gotta tell stories, this is my job,” and leaves Delight with only one weapon. Prayer.

Pray she does, telling God that she doesn’t “want to be objectipied so I pray that my Daddy cannot say ‘bitch’ and ‘ho’ and ‘skeezer’…or all those other bad words either.”
Needless to say, the prayer works. When Spoon tries to use his usual, “colorful” vocabulary, what comes out is a series of FCC inspired beeeeeeeeeeeps, or G-rated phrases like “Greetings” and “Jeewillagers.”

A previously scheduled live performance leaves him exposed and stuttering, and his meteoric rise to double-Platinum threatens to take a catastrophic turn. He gets out of a bad-boy-brutha audition by sending himself to the emergency room after eating peanuts, but not before he runs across Blew again, who he promptly dismisses. Freaked out and unable to explain what’s going on, Spoon tries the only remedy he can think of, slamming everything he can ingest, from vitamins to booze, but that just lands him in jail, where he gets the final insult, being mistaken for the rapper MoJo. Annette picks him up, but gives him the cold shoulder, not stopping to listen to his story. She’s at her wit’s end.

Until Delight asks her the next day if her prayer had worked, and Annette can only hold back laughter as Delight elaborates,( but she doesn’t believe it’s true).
Spoon, meanwhile, is spiraling down. His boys, fickle and nervous about this new whitebread turn, are distant. Spoon, desperate and perhaps lacking in judgment, lets in the one person who still wants to be near him, Blew. Blew arrives at his mansion with armloads of tabloids, having tried to eradicate any evidence of Spoon’s demise. This act of loyalty further opens the door for Blew. Blew, aka Denarius Bernstein, explains something of his roots, Jewish and Black, shows how much he’s got Spoon’s back, and before you can say Jeewillagers, he and Spoon becomes fast friends.

Just when Spoon is feeling hopeless, he gets the biggest news of his life. He’s going to play the Grammy’s. But all he can say is, “How am I gonna perform at the Grammy’s without my amo? What am I donna do? Nursery rhymes?” And now he is a desperate man. The press picks up the escapades, though, and blows them up, pushing the fact that the rhymes are failing while the antics are escalating. Spoon, goes the word, is done.

Spoon, coming out of his meltdown, has a moment to actually see his life, his family. To see that he was not there for Delight when Marco dissed her, or when she rallied back. Or for anyone who matters on a daily basis. Even so, Delight sees only her hero, reminding him that he is an eagle, that eagles can look into the sunlight, that they can do what most birds can’t.

It all feels good but still, the Grammy’s loom, and Spoon has to come up with a rhyme that won’t come out in a bleep, and will win him back his career. This time, Spoon looks for inspiration in the good things around him, Delight, his father’s church, his family. He thinks he’s got it down, but when Delight tries to bring him a Bible verse, something she knows will help him, he shoves her away, spilling her drink all over his own precious verses. He’s still missing the point.
Delight, heartsick but determined, asks God for one more prayer. Spoon prays too. This time, it seems he might have got it right. He brings in Delight, hears her verse, and things really start to cook. Together, Delight and Spoon dig for the hook, keep up the beat. Blew joins in, and the mix starts to make magic.

But will it be enough to get the deal? Or at this point, is the deal what Spoon's really after?

Latest Work

All Work

  • Test Movie 1 - Stage Play
    04/25/11
    Creative Notes:
    Rapper's Delight played to packed houses in Dallas. The play version has virtually very little profanity because we wanted it suitable for EVERYONE, which is it is. The film version is a bit dicier but clearly could work as PG or R.