Overall Recommendation:
4.4 stars
(9)
5 Stars:
55.56%
(5)
 
4 Stars:
33.33%
(3)
 
3 Stars:
11.11%
(1)
 
2 Stars:
0%
(0)
 
1 Stars:
0%
(0)
 
Premise:
4.7 stars
(7)
 
Story structure:
4.6 stars
(7)
 
Character:
4.4 stars
(7)
 
Dialogue:
4.1 stars
(7)
 
Emotion:
4.4 stars
(7)
 
 
1-9 of 9 reviews
Sort: Newest | Most helpful
2 out of 5 people found the following review helpful:

Rythmic

Overall Recommendation:
3 stars
 
Premise:
4 stars
 
Story structure:
4 stars
 
Character:
3 stars
 
Dialogue:
3 stars
 
Emotion:
3 stars
 
December 31, 2010
CHURCH CHICK

The story has a sweet lyrical quality to it, but took too long to get going. I only made it to page 27. Unfortunately there wasn’t enough to drive the plot forward. Sabrina seemed too passive; she reacted to things around her but never acted on anything. I wasn’t clear why she married the Deacon. And a lot of the characters were one dimensional – mean older husband, prudish church ladies, wise cracking younger sister. Also, the subplot with Tobin and Blair came out of nowhere. These loose ends may eventually pay off, but a shorter set up would ensure that the reader hangs in to get there. A good effort though.
 
2 out of 3 people found the following review helpful:

Well done

Overall Recommendation:
5 stars
 
Premise:
5 stars
 
Story structure:
5 stars
 
Character:
5 stars
 
Dialogue:
4 stars
 
Emotion:
5 stars
 
December 29, 2010
Excellent story structure! A very good example of how a structured story works on many levels. The interaction between the characters is natural and believable, and moments of innocent humor abound. I thoroughly enjoyed your script, and especially love the dark love triangle where two of our main characters don't really know the motives of the other. Psychologically, the tension that builds is almost palpable. Little Fatal Attraction vibe going on in parts - and that's a good thing. :-)
 
1 out of 2 people found the following review helpful:

Nice conflict and twists throughout

Overall Recommendation:
5 stars
 
Premise:
5 stars
 
Story structure:
5 stars
 
Character:
4 stars
 
Dialogue:
4 stars
 
Emotion:
3 stars
 
December 26, 2010
Oh Sabrina what are we to do with you? This is what happens when you leave the church and go worldly as they say. The character of Sabrina is on a journey. She lives at home. She married an older man. He dies on their wedding night and from that moment on Sabrina is on a wild rollercoaster when she is confronted by crazies of the world. The writer takes us up and then down then up again. We get twisted and stumped. What will Sabrina do? What will Blair do? What will Tobin do? How does the church react? The church exorism is funny. And Sabrina's sister Trisha never dissappoints.

This screenplay has a solid three act story structure. The screenplay is a fast read and you won't be disappointed if downloaded. Enjoy!
 
1 out of 3 people found the following review helpful:

Sounds like a juicy page turner

Overall Recommendation:
4 stars
 
Premise:
4 stars
 
Story structure:
4 stars
 
Character:
4 stars
 
Dialogue:
4 stars
 
Emotion:
5 stars
 

Dee

December 25, 2010
 
1 out of 3 people found the following review helpful:

Excellent

Overall Recommendation:
4 stars
 
Premise:
5 stars
 
Story structure:
5 stars
 
Character:
5 stars
 
Dialogue:
5 stars
 
Emotion:
5 stars
 
December 24, 2010
 
3 out of 4 people found the following review helpful:

Good storytelling

Overall Recommendation:
5 stars
 
Premise:
5 stars
 
Story structure:
5 stars
 
Character:
5 stars
 
Dialogue:
5 stars
 
Emotion:
5 stars
 
December 24, 2010
As a novelist, I had to understand the mechanics of screen writing. I wanted more description, but after getting more information on how a screenplay is written, M Sweeny Carey has done a fabulous job in telling an intriguing story.

Her characters are vivid and fun to read. Sabrina starts off as a shy woman, yet there is something within her that wants to change. The character arc of Sabrina takes the reader higher and brings us to a point where we are surely satisfied with her journey. She shows both an internal and external conflict of the protagonist. I found Sabrina’s family (the supporting characters) in the story to be witty and funny, especially Trisha. M Sweeny Carey also does a good job of showing the audience how deranged Blair is and her down fall.

Overall, this story is a nice romance comedy with potential to the silver screen.
 
1 out of 3 people found the following review helpful:

Great!

Overall Recommendation:
4 stars
 
Premise:
No rating
 
Story structure:
No rating
 
Character:
No rating
 
Dialogue:
No rating
 
Emotion:
No rating
 
December 24, 2010
 
2 out of 4 people found the following review helpful:

FIRST DRAFT WAS GOOD, SECOND DRAFT IS GREAT

Overall Recommendation:
5 stars
 
Premise:
No rating
 
Story structure:
No rating
 
Character:
No rating
 
Dialogue:
No rating
 
Emotion:
No rating
 
December 24, 2010
Nice work cleaning it up, Michelle!
 
1 out of 3 people found the following review helpful:

This is so funny and true!

Overall Recommendation:
5 stars
 
Premise:
5 stars
 
Story structure:
4 stars
 
Character:
5 stars
 
Dialogue:
4 stars
 
Emotion:
5 stars
 
December 23, 2010
 

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